Emotional distress is a far more common problem than many people realise. Many people try very hard to fit in, to be like everyone else. In doing so, they often ignore or push away their own needs, in particular their emotional needs. This is how society is geared. This is how children are reared – to put others first, without honouring their own individuality.
Noble as this may sound, it creates enormous stress and often the only way out is to numb ourselves.
We are born to experience a diverse and often complex array of emotions. This is normal, natural and very healthy. But in our unhealthy society, this can be uncomfortable and confronting and we may be dubbed ‘weird’ or worse when we express them.
In suppressing the uncomfortable emotions, we also inevitably suppress those at the other end of the scale – the delight, the heartfelt pleasure, the childlike wonder of discovery. In effect we become robots. Our lives take on a never ending greyness.
In an attempt to deal with life without accepting, honouring and allowing our emotions expression, many turn to distractions. Often these become addictions in time – over eating, alcohol, smoking, shopping, incessant talking and other obsessive behaviours.
Yet, to find peace, we must allow our feelings to come up. We must learn to discover what they mean for us personally. If we have a gut feeling that we shouldn’t do something, but it is a socially acceptable thing to do, and difficult to refuse, then we should follow our gut feeling. Deal with the situation this action has created later. We don’t need to explain.
Using the expression ‘it doesn’t feel right’ and said with such conviction that it brooks no argument, can be useful.
When you next feel yourself trying to avoid an uncomfortable emotion, try stopping what you are doing and inwardly (or outwardly if no-one is about) talking to the feeling, as if it is a real person. But be friendly. Be curious. Ask what it is all about. You may get some inner answers.
When we suppress our feelings, our emotions, we disconnect that link to our deeper selves. We are more that physical beings. We are energetic beings. And we need that energetic (or spiritual) nourishment to remain sane.
Some strong emotions can be difficult to deal with, while we are trying to juggle the chaos that makes up our daily lives. In these cases, instead of reaching for medication that numb all feelings, turn to homeopathic treatment. The effect is very different. Instead of numbing us, we simply find that external triggers no longer have the same impact on us; it’s as if the wire behind the button has been disconnected. We easily, without effort, avoid the situations that cause us emotional distress.
Allow yourself to experience the rich flavours of life. Allow the vivd colours of emotions to paint your experience of life. Then you become alive.